Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Love the One You're With

Recently, on a blogging forum that I am part of, I was asked a question. The question was "Do you love the one you're with, or did that right one get away? Do you think there is someone else out there for you?". It was definitely a question that makes you stop, a little taken aback and think. I mean, this is a forum where us ladies talk about what we ate for lunch, where we want to vacation, basically we shoot the shit and pass some time. These ladies, although I haven't met many in person, I have gotten to ''know''. Some of them pretty well and it was quite shocking to see how candid some of these ladies were. Some of the women who I thought were so happily married said some surprising things such as "I think I settled, but hopefully we'll grow to love one another" and other admitted that her and her husband were separating because HE was the one who let the ''right one'' get away. Our conversations went back and forth for a few hours and it really made me appreciate what I have with Nick a little more than I did before... Here's how I responded...

"I love Nick with all of my heart. He is my everything. He not only taught me how to trust and love, he taught me to love myself. We laugh together, we cry together, we have fun together. But most importantly we have respect for each other. A respect that is the basic foundation of our relationship and sets the tone for who we are together and how we treat eachother. Of course we argue and bicker. We have our ups and we have our downs. But, at the end of the day HE's the one I chose to spend the rest of my life with and we don't let our "downs" define who we are together.

Now, with that being said, yes, I have been in what I thought was love before. It was that 16 years old, first boyfriend, first love, we're invincible and I think I want to spend the rest of my life with you kind of love. Did I think about marrying that first boyfriend I had in high school? Of course. I thought he was the only one out there for me. Looking back at that time in my life and that relationship, would a marriage with him have lasted? No way. Did we have fun together? Did I enjoy that relationship? Of course I did. But it wasn't the real thing like it is with Nick. But I don't think there is anything wrong with having loved someone before Nick, it's human, it's something that made me who I am. Truthfully, with out that first love, I don't know if I would have had the courage and heart to realize that what I have with Nick was the genuine real thing. I needed that experience to have and appreciate what I have with Nick- if that makes sense.

I also happen to think that there IS more than one person out there for you, it's just a matter of who you fit best with. Well that and maybe a little luck and right timing. I'd hate to think if god-forbid, anything bad were to happen to Nick, that if I chose to move on that there wouldn't be someone else out there for me. Will it be that same type of deep love that Nick and I share? Probably not, but then again, every relationship is different. I'm not saying that if Nick were to die I would even want to find someone else at some point, but thinking that there wouldn't even be that option is quite a sad and lonely thought. Just like if something were to happen to Nick, if something were to happen to me, I would hope that Nick would be able to one day find someone else instead of living a sad lonely existence. But this isn't even something I want to think about until we are old, decrepit and grey (even if Nick is almost to that point HA!).

So yes, with all of my heart and all of my soul, I love the one I'm with.


  1. Love it Anne, straight from the heart. Ed and I agreed that after spending 24/7 together (granted we were in Hawaii) and still in love at the end, we are meant to be as well. Miss you guys :) XOXO

  2. I completely agree with you on the 1st love thing...I thought for sure I was going to marry my high school boyfriend, but looking back, I am very glad that I didn't. I am grateful for the experience, and it did help me realize that I was marrying the right person!

    And I just looked at your "About Me" and realized we have the same wedding anniversary!

  3. this is a wonderful post... and very true. glad you found your "happily ever after" :)

  4. I agree with this post. On the other hand if you don't love the person ,everyday will like be a punishment to you.

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