But...But...You're SO Young!

If there is one thing I hate, it's when people judge me based on being young and married. I get very sensitive about this subject and it seems to come up quite often. Maybe it's because I am in NYC, and around here it is sort of odd to get married in your early 20's, maybe people are just dumb. But voicing your objection and opinion on my life choices is not only rude and inconsiderate, it's annoying. What sparks this you ask? This morning and my wonderfully awkward train ride to work...

I was minding my own business like every morning, reading my book and I noticed that the woman sitting to my left kept looking at me. She would look at my face, then down to my left hand, and back up to my face again. Now in normal circumstances, I don't start conversations on the train. I like my 40 minutes of peace and quiet in the morning, my "Me" time if you would. But, when you are sitting shoulder to shoulder with someone and their eyes are glued to your face, it's a bit hard to concentrate on reading. I looked over to her and asked her if I could help her with something. She gasped and said "I am so sorry, and I'm not judging you, but are your really married?" The only thing I could say was "Um, excuse me, what?" so she said again But, you're so young! I see the rings on your hand but you just look SO young to be married" Calmly I asked her how young she thought I was and she said 15! When I told her that I was almost 25 she didn't believe me.

Ok,I know I look young. I'm 5'1", skinny, and I get carded to buy tickets to rated R movies, but 15?? This is what I look like today.....

(sorry for the crappy quality, on the phone in my office)

 The rest of the train ride was spent listening to her talk about how she just couldn't believe how young I was and how shocked she was that I was married. She told me to wait on having children because 23 was too young to get married and 25 is way too young to have babies. According to her, I am still a baby myself. Gee, thanks lady!

This wasn't the first time someone has asked how old I was and were shocked when they realized that I was married. I don't get it, even if I was 15 and getting married, it is none of your business! How does my being 24 and married have any impact on your life what-so- ever? I'm not 15, pregnant with my 2nd child, and living in a trailer and married to my 2nd baby-daddy(I know, I know so UN-PC of me, but I'm painting a picture here)! I am 24, have an amazing career, my life together, and most important, a loving husband. I AM young, I know this. I also know that a lot of people my age aren't mature enough for this type of commitment nor do they WANT this type of commitment at this age. But I also know plenty of men and women who are in their 30's who aren't ready or mature enough either.

 Now, I am not saying that I'm the most mature girl in the world, but I did know that when I met Nick, I had something very special and uncommon. I WAS ready and I did WANT to get married. Before Nick, it was hard for me to let anyone into ''my-space" (no not the website)and I didn't let anyone get close to me. I would find the littlest fault in any date I had and quickly end it. I had a 3 year relationship before Nick, but it was long-distance so I didn't have to constantly be around my boyfriend at that time. It was safe. But when I met Nick, I knew I couldn't push him away. I had found someone who accepted me and all of my faults, quirks, fears, etc and loved me despite all of that. I wasn't about to let that go even if I was "young".

While I don't have many friends here on the East Coast who are married, I do have plenty of friends back in MI that are- some even with babies! To me, it's not uncommon to be married in your early 20's. Both of my older sisters got married in their early 20's and so did my mom. Maybe it is a regional thing. I do notice many more women here who are single until their early to mid-thirties and there is nothing wrong with that. But, I don't judge them for taking longer to find someone to spend their life with, so don't judge me because I did it a little quicker. Age is just a number and sometimes people forget that.

My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding- OBSESSED!

Nick is out with clients all day and I can't seem to find motivation to get myself up and actually do something productive. So naturally the only logical thing for me to do is watch a marathon of crappy reality tv, DUH! Because Nick doesn't share my obsession (other than the Bachelor/Bachelorette but more on that later) this was the perfect time to catch up on one of my favorite things of all time- My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding.



So a few years ago my oldest sister Laura was getting married. While on the search for her wedding dress we came across this amazing website. Featured on it were what they were calling Irish Travelers. Back before the glory that is the TLC show My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding, this website sucked me in and I couldn't look away. It was like a bad car crash where you know you shouldn't look but you do anyway. I then spent the next few weeks learning everything about these Irish Travelers that I could find-it was mind boggling that they existed and their weddings were so insane. I mean, who wouldn't want a chubby mini me bride on your special day? Or your bridesmaids to look like Day-Glo Hilighters mashed up with strippers?

Fast forward five years as I'm flipping through channels on tv, I almost fall of my chair. In front of my eyes was my dream come true. TLC picked up the hit British TV show "My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding". How better to rekindle my obsession by a weekly show featuring one bride's wedding and everything that goes into it?! I was in Gypsy Heaven!

Here are some of my faves-


The errr, blushing bride!







And who wouldn't want guests like this at their wedding?

So here I am on this gorgeous summer day, coffee in hand, lazy pup by my side, catching up on my obsession with no one to complain!

Real Weddings: Our Wedding Day

Today I finally got around to picking photos for our wedding album (yes, 19 months later...) and it took me back to that wonderful, amazing, fall day a year and a half ago. It then dawned on me that while we talk about being newlyweds on this blog, we haven't actually talked about the day we got married! So here is the short long version...

We got married on November 28, 2009 in Clarkston, MI (my home town). Because I am Catholic and Nick is Jewish, we actually had two ceremonies. We were legally married in the Catholic church, a decision we decided from day one was best for us, and then we had a symbolic Jewish ceremony later in the evening at the reception hall.

The entire week before the wedding I was a mess, the events leading up to the wedding were almost comical at this point and I was ready to just say “screw it” and elope in Las Vegas! I was already very stressed out due to breaking 3 of my toes and having 5" heels to wear on my wedding day, a family friend died the week of the wedding, my mom, sister, and nephew all got sick with the swine flu and my dad had come down with some sort of sickness that kept him in bed until about 30 minutes before the ceremony (little did I know that he would end up in the ER at midnight, but more on that later...).. Somehow, the morning of the wedding, we woke up to clear blue skies and 50 degree weather- at least I had this going for me!! My friend Elisa came over did my hair, and some of the girls in the wedding party, and then I went to get my makeup done. My photographer met us at the salon where I was getting my hair done and that's when it really started to feel real!

After my make up was set we headed home, packed the cars and headed to the church. I got dressed at the church, took some pictures with my girls, and then it was time to go!

The minute my dad walked me to the beginning of the aisle all of my stress melted away. My dad, who you would never know had a 104 degree fever, kept whispering things in my ear like ''let's skip'' and ''don't fall'', and it took everything for me not to crack up.

The ceremony was beautiful and really touching. The priest talked a lot on how to combine our two faiths into one and using that to teach us to listen and learn from one another. We didn't have a full mass as we felt it would be long and awkward being that about 60% of our guests were Jewish, but the ceremony still lasted about 40 minutes.

After the ceremony we headed to our little downtown area and took some photos of the wedding party. 

Cocktail hour started at 6pm at our reception hall, Indianwood Country Club, and at 6:45 our Jewish Ceremony started. It was so amazing to be able to have this ceremony. It was much more personalized than the Catholic ceremony as we got to write our own vows and letters to each other that were then read aloud. I was so happy to be able to incorporate all of Nick's traditions and customs into our wedding day. During this ceremony I had actually changed to wear my mom's wedding dress from 1979. Only my mom knew I was doing this- the look on my dad's face when he realized what I was wearing was priceless. 

 After the Jewish ceremony, the real party started. We danced until midnight and everyone had a great time. Even with all of the stress of our day and worrying about my family, I would still not change a thing about our wedding day. Looking back now, we laugh at everything that went on, but it was such an amazing day filled with love that I would never take back!

***After the reception, my dad got rushed to the ER by my two brother-in-laws and he was there for a week. Turns out he had some sort of infection. The whole night I was so worried about him, but I didn't know just how bad sick he actually was. It really makes me love my dad even more that although all night I told him to leave the reception and go to the Dr's, and that his health was more important than my wedding day, he not only stayed, you would have never, ever known just how sick he was.

Real Weddings: Elisa and Justin

Hey, it's Anne! 

This past weekend we traveled back to my hometown of Clarkston, MI for one of my closest friends weddings. The sun was shining, the ceremony was filled with love, and the reception was amazing. Not to mention, Elisa looked STUNNING! They are a couple that really are meant to be together. When you are with them you really see the special bond and love that their share. It warms my heart that my friend met someone who makes her happier than I've ever seen her. He's a great guy and I couldn't be happier for them.

 

 Nick and me on the way to the wedding.

While being able to celebrate the marriage of friends is lots of fun, it's also a great time for Nick and me to remember our wedding vows and to sort of relive those promises we made to each other 18 months ago. 

 The beautiful bride and handsome groom!

Friends forever!

  

Congratulations Elisa and Justin, enjoy your newlywed bliss!

Check Your Score Before You Wreck Your Score!

Hey, Nick here!

The saying, “Money talks,” doesn’t always ring true. You could be Donald Trump and not be able to get a mortgage if your credit rating is in the (diamond studded) toilet. Your salary isn’t the only factor when trying to get financing for your new McMansion. Your FICO score, AKA credit rating, plays a major part in that as well. If your credit is less than stellar, then you are going to want to read my tips on how to get those numbers up.

Trying to understand how credit ratings work will give you a headache bigger than your credit card debt. Basically, anything above 700 is considered excellent and is extremely attractive when applying for a mortgage. It’s definitely a score that you would want to bring home to mom. Only a select few are in that range so don’t worry, 620 – 699 is considered just fine as well. Whew! A score lower than 620 is going to be a tough. So, my best advice for you in that case would be to increase your score slowly but surely. 40% of your score is derived from your payment history, so make sure that you at least get all your minimum payments in on time. It also couldn’t hurt to sacrifice a latte or two a week and put a few extra $$$ towards your payments every month. If you happen to miss a payment it only takes 30 days for it to show up on your credit report, so don’t go getting other credit cards to help boost your score until you pay off the old ones. Focus on past debts that you owe first, because those can linger on your credit report for upwards of 7 years. YIKES! Don’t throw your credit cards out the window just yet. If you do that, some passer-by may pick them up and go on a shopping spree in your honor and not pay it off. That would really bring your score down.

You’re probably thinking to yourself, “Oh no, I’ll never be able to get a mortgage!” That’s not true. If you’re reading this blog post, then you’re probably married (or soon-to-be), so if your spouse has better credit (like mine does) you can always apply for a loan with the better score. True, your buying power won’t be as high with only one salary on the books, but just like using your credit cards, it’s best to buy a home below your means.